damigella: (wilson + doc teddybear)
[personal profile] damigella
Title: See You Tomorrow
Spoilers: none
Summary: Triple drabble: House and Wilson have changed their lunchtime routine.
Rating: R for explicit smut.
Warning: From my darkest side. Not beta read. Highlight for possible triggers. Severe brain injury, non-con.
Word Count: 300.
ETA: An ff review starts with the words: Sorry, this is sick.
EATA: [livejournal.com profile] storm_seller has written an amazing companion piece from House's viewpoint, Not If I See You First.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the House, MD characters, which is good since I tend to kill them. Or worse.

Wilson looks with desire at House's naked body: sensual mouth, wide shoulders and narrow hips, long shapely legs, elegant feet. He should be used to it by now, and yet the sight always takes his breath away. Then Wilson's hands and mouth start performing their magic, and soon the shriveled penis is standing erect. His fingers trace the vein climbing along it, his lips push down the foreskin and his tongue teases the slit, his other hand circles the soft silk of the balls.

Time for condoms and lube. After doing it almost every day for months he doesn’t need preparation anymore; he just straddles House, one knee on each side, and slowly lowers himself, gently guiding his lover inside him. A deep breath as his body admits the welcome intrusion, and then he pushes down all the way, moaning as he feels his own balls resting on House’s skin.

For a moment he wishes he could see the blue of the closed eyes. Then he starts pushing himself up and down, slowly increasing the rhythm while he kneads House’s nipples. When he feels that his lover is close to the edge, he moves his left hand to his own body, synchronizing its movements with those of his thighs. With practiced ease he brings them both to orgasm simultaneously, his ring muscles contracting around House’s throbbing cock.

He quickly cleans them both up and disposes of the condoms. "We'll spend the whole next weekend together, I have no urgent case." Once he's dressed and everything is tidy again, he unlocks the door, then checks one last time House's monitor. "See you tomorrow," he adds as he leaves the Vegetative State Patients room.

He tarries a moment before closing the door, hopelessly waiting for an answer. As he does every day.

*****

Author's note: This ficlet is inspired by Pedro Almodovar's movie Talk To Her.

Date: 2011-04-16 10:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] justjuly4.livejournal.com
That was unexpected and heart-breaking... Poor Wilson! It's dark, but I like this kind of stories. I remember the film too.

Date: 2011-04-16 11:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
"heart-breaking... Poor Wilson!"

Your reaction is mine, exactly. But this fic has been sitting on my hard disk for weeks, because I feel that I'll get all kinds of flak for making Wilson into a rapist. I think having seen the movie helps "get" Wilson's behavior correctly.

And I can only imagine the sadness of the long weekend hours, with the television on and Wilson commenting to an unresponsive House all his (i.e. House's) favorite shows. Holding his hand, and waiting for an impossible miracle.

Date: 2011-04-16 11:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] justjuly4.livejournal.com
Oh, yes! I can picture "holding his hand, and waiting for an impossible miracle" this too. I don't see Wilson as a rapist (so I didn't consider Almodovar's character being one), but may be I'm wrong and a perverse...

Date: 2011-04-16 12:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
There's no denying that House isn't in a position to give or withdraw consent, so what Wilson is doing is definitely rape in a technical sense. And yet, to me it isn't.
Maybe there's a cultural divide here. It would be interesting to me to have the opinion (even if negative/disgusted) of readers from different countries.

Date: 2011-04-16 12:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] justjuly4.livejournal.com
May be you could post it in house_wilson community to get more feedback from people from different cultures/countries?

Date: 2011-04-16 12:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Ok, I'll try. If they throw tomatoes at me, we can share spaghetti with tomato sauce :-).

Date: 2011-04-16 12:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] justjuly4.livejournal.com
I do love Italian food :) :) Seriously, I hope reader's reaction will be okay. It's not the darkest fic I've ever seen.

Date: 2011-04-16 01:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I got a "Sorry, this is sick". So I now included that in the warning :-).

Date: 2011-04-16 12:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deelaundry.livejournal.com
One of the good things about fanfic is that it allows us to explore a lot of issues -- including consent.

Using the black bar to provide warnings without spoiling what's in the fic is a great technique. You might want to consider adding the general statement "Warning for possible triggers" before the black bar. That seems to be the standard to let people know that the fic covers a sensitive subject.

Date: 2011-04-16 01:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I hope I did this right. The black bar was patiently explained to me by [livejournal.com profile] jezziejay.

I seem to have a very, how shall I say, personal view on consent. And of course I think it's way healthier to explore it in fanfiction than in RL.

Thanks for commenting and for the suggestion.

Date: 2011-04-16 12:56 pm (UTC)
ext_471285: (Default)
From: [identity profile] flywoman.livejournal.com
Does this fall into the "or worse" category? :P

My reaction depends on whether I interpret their sexual relationship as beginning after House becomes helpless or established well before. If the former, Wilson's actions are pretty reprehensible. If the latter... it's more like the logical extension of an X-Files story I wrote many years ago: http://archiveofourown.org/works/129287

Either way, I think that the way Wilson makes sure that House (or at least his body) is also gratified by their encounters is very much in-character.

Date: 2011-04-16 01:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
It definitely falls into the "or worse", which was added specifically for this fic.
And I purposefully left it unclear whether there had been consent before. To each their Wilson.

And Wilson wouldn't have done it at all if there had been no reaction from House's body. I can imagine it starting by him once noticing a hard-on, and not resisting the temptation to bring House to orgasm, and being surprised at succeeding. This is the one way he can briefly pretend House is still alive. Still there. Still having some form of pleasure. I think it is not a coincidence that he makes sure that House has the "active" role in their encounters.

I liked your story, and it seems to go in the same direction. However, Almodovar's movie is really much closer to my fic (and it might contain an answer to your question, but one you may not like).

Date: 2011-04-16 02:10 pm (UTC)
ext_471285: (Default)
From: [identity profile] flywoman.livejournal.com
I figured that you had left their history vague on purpose. And I did imagine that the routine might have started somewhat as you just described. That is the similar sentiment that I saw in our two fics - the desire to believe that the person loved is still somewhere in there, and that they can be reached, maybe recovered, by interacting with the body.

I've seen some of Almodovar's other films, but not, I think, "Talk to Her."

Date: 2011-04-16 02:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
"the desire to believe that the person loved is still somewhere in there, and that they can be reached, maybe recovered, by interacting with the body."

That. In Wilson's case, though, there is also the illusion of a response from House - because his body does respond. In my mind Wilson comes with his eyes closed, glad to forget for a brief moment that House isn't really there.

Thank you for two very perceptive comments (and the link to a great fic).

Date: 2011-04-16 12:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deelaundry.livejournal.com
So sad. Wilson must be terribly lonely.

Date: 2011-04-16 01:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Yes. I think missing someone whom you love and is dead is bad, but missing someone whose body is functioning but whom you cannot communicate with must be much worse. Wilson is attempting to establish whatever connection he can. He's desperate.

Date: 2011-04-16 01:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maldeluxx.livejournal.com
Sad (yet kind of hot) and quietly waiting. *sighs* :)

Date: 2011-04-16 01:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I wonder how far down the hotness a reader starts realizing that there's an odd lack of response on House's part. That's what's supposed to make this really angsty.

Thanks for reading and commenting. I love all comments, even the negative ones, but those like yours are of course my favorite.

Date: 2011-04-16 02:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maldeluxx.livejournal.com
:)

The highlight kind of tells it, but it's revealed slowly enough. Yes, Wilson misses the House-awake, but House's response to Wilson's desires might not be the same then, at least not as easily. *hmm* :(

Date: 2011-04-16 02:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Now I'll have to ask someone who didn't read the warning highlight :). I never do since the only thing that is a trigger for me (extreme verbal abuse by a parent) doesn't usually carry a warning: I can watch Arlene interact with Cuddy but I find it almost unbearably painful.

"House's response to Wilson's desires might not be the same then, at least not as easily."
As I said, I decided to leave the question whether the sexual relationship started before or after the vegetative state open. It's a big difference; in a sense, almost two different fics. I like the idea of the reader wondering what is more likely, and how their moral evaluation of Wilson's actions changes in each case.

Thank you!

Date: 2011-04-16 02:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] writerdot.livejournal.com
Hmm...I agree with Flywoman. It would depend on the back story, and when their sexual relationship started....Having said that, without the backstory, I feel uneasy when I read it, just because House isn't able to say yes/no.

I think the way you approached the end was interesting--and I read the warnings. The way you wrote Wilson getting ready for the sex was almost methodical and scientific, which I think is a good way of describing this new 'routine', because it has become that way.

Hope this makes sense. Still sick. lol.

Date: 2011-04-16 03:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
"Having said that, without the backstory, I feel uneasy when I read it, just because House isn't able to say yes/no."
I think I'm kind of uncertain what I think in that case. In a sense, there's no doubt it's rape and would be legally punishable. On the other hand, it is clear that Wilson's motivation isn't mainly his own physical gratification. I think I would find it justifiable, but that's me.

"describing this new 'routine'"
I think the fact that "sex" is actually routine is sad beyond words.

"Still sick."
My fic, or you? Unfortunately, I think the answer is (also) you. Get well soon. Not that I care about your health, but I want to know how plausible deniability ends ;-).

Date: 2011-04-16 03:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] writerdot.livejournal.com
I think the fact that "sex" is actually routine is sad beyond words.

Yes, it is.

My fic, or you? Unfortunately, I think the answer is (also) you. Get well soon. Not that I care about your health, but I want to know how plausible deniability ends ;-).

Ugh, it would be me. lol. I have been trying to write, but considering how I feel, everything is coming out crappy and I don't like it. Blah. I hate being sick.

Date: 2011-04-16 03:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
"I hate being sick."
I'm sending Internet hugs and my favorite medications (strawberries with cream and warm milk with cognac - if you're lactose intolerant, dark chocolate with hazelnuts).

Date: 2011-04-16 03:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] writerdot.livejournal.com
Thank you, lovely. :-)

You know, I saw your comment on that yesterday, then funnily enough, my sister brought me a dark chocolate bar with little raspberries in it. It was yummy. lol.

Sorry, I deleted the other post, cause I thought I replied in the wrong spot. Whoops.

Date: 2011-04-16 03:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
You are sick. And I'm totally upsetting myself by feeling worried about you in a motherly way - I'm a mother! I think like a mother! Someone shoot me, please.

I wish I could get raspberries in my dark chocolate as well, and I'm glad you have such a smart sister.

Date: 2011-04-16 03:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] somniator429.livejournal.com
and he get only the fact that there's nothing to change from House...everyday. so sad and dark.. but I like it.

Date: 2011-04-16 04:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Thank you very much for your comment, and for getting exactly what I meant.

Date: 2011-04-16 04:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cuddyclothes.livejournal.com
Okay, officially squicked out here. Especially having their history vague, I feel like Wilson is taking advantage of House. Non con - do not like.

Date: 2011-04-16 04:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I am so sorry. Let me know if I should replace the "highlight for triggers" with, well, just triggers.
Have you seen the movie I mentioned? If not, I very strongly suggest you don't. Because at least I left the possibility open that House and Wilson had had a sexual relationship before. Almodovar... well, you don't want to see that. Enough said.

Date: 2011-04-16 04:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cuddyclothes.livejournal.com
I remember when Nicholas Cage is dying at the end of "Leaving Las Vegas" when Elizabeth Shue climbs on top of him and he dies after orgasm. The only problem I had with that was that he was dying of alcohol poisoning. Show me a guy that drunk who can get it up (while comatose, no less) and I have a bridge I'd like you to buy.

I read it because the comments interested me. I'm just expressing my opinion.

Date: 2011-04-16 04:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
"I'm just expressing my opinion."
I was just very concerned about not having done my duty properly with the warnings.

I always like to hear everybody's opinions, and am especially thankful to negative (or non-totally positive) ones, because they are the ones I learn from most. An of course I particularly appreciate opinions by people whose work I have a high opinion of.

Thank you very much for your finding the time to comment twice. I stand by my recommendation on Almodovar's movie.

Date: 2011-04-16 07:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sara-tsuzuki.livejournal.com
YAY woa, good fic! °0°

Date: 2011-04-16 07:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I'm glad you liked it and let me know! Thank you!

Date: 2011-04-17 10:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alternatealto.livejournal.com
I don't know what it says about me that I realized what was going on at the end of the first paragraph (and I didn't even look at the warnings, so don't ask me how I knew it because I couldn't tell you).

I can empathize with Wilson here, although I have to say I agree with the other commenters who have already mentioned that it makes all the difference whether or not the two of them were involved sexually before this.

Disturbing, but well-written.

Date: 2011-04-18 03:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
"I realized what was going on at the end of the first paragraph "

It could be that, having read Brain Damage, you figured out I was royally pissed at the people complaining about a mentally handicapped person having sex for the sheer physical pleasure of it, and deciding "if you find that icky, wait and see what I can come up with."
Or it could be that you realized that something was terribly wrong, in that House wasn't reacting at all. It was meant to sound wrong.
Or it was just too long. I tried hard to make this into a drabble, but couldn't.

Thank you for the "well-written", I value your praise highly.

Date: 2011-04-20 03:11 pm (UTC)
ext_622702: (James Wilson)
From: [identity profile] selkie3.livejournal.com
I'm going to say it... I liked this. Such a big impact for such few words. I know that some people cannot imagine Wilson doing such a thing, but to what needs to be stressed is what Wilson would do for House. I've also read some of the previous comments, and though them being in a previous relationship justifies Wilson's actions to a certain extent... I don't feel this piece is about that, it is about his connection to House, in any way or manner.

Date: 2011-04-20 06:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
"I don't feel this piece is about that, it is about his connection to House, in any way or manner."

As I said in the poll comment, it's weird how I sometimes need other people comments to understand my own thoughts. Thank you for being so perceptive.

Date: 2011-04-20 06:57 pm (UTC)
ext_622702: (James Wilson)
From: [identity profile] selkie3.livejournal.com
Forgive me for rambling on, but I have been thinking about this piece all morning!

This was about more than making love/sex (of course, this depends on the reader's viewpoint. This isn't even about if Wilson really wants House in a sexual manner. This goes beyond that, and so, in its own way it's beautiful (god, I hope I don't get flamed for writing that). If Wilson were the one in the vegetative state, I can House doing the same to him. And if Wilson were to ever somehow wake up, and learn of what House had done, I can see him accepting and understanding House's actions.

Wilson has said that the two most important things he has are his job and his "screwed up friendship" with House, and so to loose one of them would of course devastate him. The continuation of that relationship (no matter how tenuous or how) would be his goal. And since we know of House's dependance of Wilson, the same holds true.

Date: 2011-04-21 06:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Yes. This. It's a last way to stay connected, when everything else fails. When there are no more words, no more looks (I think they communicate with their eyes as much as with their tongues, thanks also to being portrayed by two brilliant actors).

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