damigella: (sad_thoughtful_wilson)
[personal profile] damigella
Drabble Prologue
Chapter 1, warnings, and stuff.
Chapter 2
Chapter 3


Chapter 4


"How did it go?"

"What do you mean?"

"Your date, you moron. Weren't you having dinner with the new radiology assistant? The fake blonde with the fake tits?"

Wilson closed his laptop, put his elbows on the table and his forehead in his hands.

"House, it's almost midnight. I don't want to discuss my private life with you, and in particular not now."

House eyed him with suspicion. He was definitely hiding something.

"Wilson, it's been three months since the end of the trial, and Mendelsohn's stuck in until 2030. Yet you're still working part time and still waking up in the night shouting and crying. You've gained back only a fraction of the weight you lost, and I had expected to find a stethoscope on the doorknob tonight, not you reading The New York Review of Books. That's why I came back so late."

"It's none of your damn business. I'm off to bed."
_____

The next day by late afternoon all the hospital knew that Dr James Wilson, former Oncology Head, had left Sheila Thompson waiting for him in a French restaurant for twenty minutes before calling her cell to say he was too sick to leave home.
_____


It was a sunny Sunday morning, and they had just finished breakfast. That is, House had eaten eggs and bacon, while Wilson hadn't yet finished his bowl of diet cereals and skimmed milk. He claimed to be careful about his health, but House wasn't so sure.

Their living together was really not so good for Wilson, who had been taking care of House long enough and clearly needed to go back to his life and privacy: hopefully the pantypeeling days would come back as well.

"Have you started planning when you'll be moving out?"

"What do you mean?"

Wilson snapped out of his wordless contemplation of soggy granola, looking worried.

"I finally got rid of the anklet, so I imagine you'll want go back to the condo. I can manage to take care of myself."

"Well, I can't very well do so right now. It's rented out until the end of the year." He paused briefly. "If I'm in your way I can move to a hotel."

"No, of course not, I'm happy to have you here. I just thought a bit of privacy would do you good."

"Speaking of which, I need a shower."

House sighed as he heard the bathroom door close. Were it for him, Wilson need never leave. Living together had been a huge help, both from a practical side and as a way to get used to normality again. Chatting in front of the television, beer in hand, had reminded him of the time before prison, and helped him forget the anklet.

He looked down at where it used to be. Six months. He would remember the feeling for the rest of his life, probably, and who knows how long it would be before he felt really free to go anywhere other than PPTH. Before he felt free.

The day of the anklet removal, the previous Wednesday, Park and Adams had organized a surprise dinner at House's favorite steakhouse in Atlantic City (funded, he suspected, by Adams) and even Foreman had been there, happy and relaxed, to inform him that he was reinstated with his previous income, although without tenure. If House was willing to take a pay cut the hospital might find matching funds to pay one or possibly even two team members, if one of them accepted a low income.

Wilson had excused himself, pleading a headache, and indeed he had looked suffering as he waived House goodbye. In fact, he couldn't remember seeing him happy for a very, very long time now, and he only got out to work and buy groceries.

House decided to forget his worries and switched on the TV. Wilson just needed to get his own place back. No couch could be as good as a bed.

_____
It was Adams who had had the right intuition, but it had been Park's prompt reaction that had saved the patient's life. House smiled as he slowly walked the last steps to his own door, tired but satisfied with himself and his team. He had expected to need an all-nighter, and here he was barely later than usual.

He hadn't called Wilson to inform him of the change of plans - he was curious to see what he did when alone. There was something really weird going on; his mood had darkened further instead of improving since the trial's happy conclusion. He turned the key in the lock, and exclaimed cheerfully "Honey! I'm hooooome!" while stepping in.

The lights were on, everything was clean and tidy as he had gotten used to since Wilson moved in. There was a covered dish on the table, probably his dinner, but no one in sight. Maybe the bathroom? Indeed, the bathroom's light was on. He knocked.

"Wilson! You'd never believe it! It was lupus this time!"

The silence lengthened, and House got worried. He tried the bathroom door, and found it locked. "Wilson! Everything fine?"

He counted to ten, then limped to the kitchen. He came back with a butter knife, which he used to open the bathroom door. The smell hit him one split second before he saw the body floating in the reddish liquid that filled the bathtub.

Date: 2011-10-27 06:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Don't worry, he's not dying. Thanks to House and to a large amount of good luck.

Date: 2011-10-27 06:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] justjuly4.livejournal.com
Oh! It's awful! Please save Wilson, will you? *happy for House having a party* *happy for Mendelson sentenced to life*

Date: 2011-10-27 07:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I'll save Wilson because you ask so kindly :).
And House definitely needed a party! Also because it will be a while before he can feel happy again (I am so evil).

Date: 2011-10-27 06:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hibernia1.livejournal.com
Oh, Wilson, you idiot... More! Also, thanks for sharing!

Date: 2011-10-28 03:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Wilson's very sick, and the world-level diagnostician he's living with is apparently not that good with psych trouble. I think he normally would be better, but he's been thrown quite a bit off kilter himself by the prison experience.

Glad you like it, and from here on things are getting better.

Date: 2011-10-29 08:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hibernia1.livejournal.com
Well, House isn´t a psychiatrist, which is a one of the hardest specialties around, so, don´t be too hard on him...

I love it!

Date: 2011-10-30 11:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
As you'll see it will be rather a case of House being hard with himself.

Thank you for the unwavering support!

Date: 2011-10-31 09:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hibernia1.livejournal.com
You're welcome!

Date: 2011-10-27 08:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] luridlurker.livejournal.com
I really wish you would take your time to write this story properly, deep and wordy, and not in such a rushed-through exposé style that...is simply not enough for me, sorry.

Date: 2011-10-28 03:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I really wish you would take your time
I am already taking time I don't have, unfortunately. Sorry about that.

Let's make a deal: you write something and I promise I'll be more careful with the next fic?

Date: 2011-10-28 04:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] luridlurker.livejournal.com
ah, not so good a deal from my side of it. You are such a good writer and it hurts me to see you giving away such good story ideas for a hurried execution as if someone was forcing you by point of gun to finish the story inside a week or else. I wish you would take the time you used for the whole story for just one chapter. Wow, what a heartbreaking, psycholocical deep piece of art that would become! Don't give your talent away in weighting quantity over quality , please. It just pains me! And on the more egoistical side: I would give my left hand for having the story ideas you have, so how dare you not respecting the gift you have! *stumping with foot*
Actually I have no right to criticize you in any way, forgive me. Im just venting my own frustrations on a proxy...you.

Date: 2011-10-28 08:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
What you said is true at a deeper level than you think: I am actually not using correctly the one gift I have. That's why I have to cut back on fanfic. Fanfic is what I use to keep my sick brain from landing me in hospital - my gift is elsewhere.

You on the other hand ARE an awesomely gifted writer and raisonneuse, but so long as I don't have your address I cannot come and physically kick your butt, which I am sometimes really tempted to do when I read how you denigrate yourself.

Date: 2011-10-29 04:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] luridlurker.livejournal.com
And we'll better stop here as I shouldn't have more opportunities to stuck my foot in my mouth.

Date: 2011-10-30 11:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I wasn't offended at all. I just feel so terribly guilt for every minute I spend here, and the only justification I have is that it's good for my sanity.

Date: 2011-10-27 09:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] menolly-au.livejournal.com
Argghhh...House asking Wilson to think about leaving was definitely not a good move on his part (although he thought he was doing it for Wilson's own good). While House's life is improving Wilson has been slowly sinking. At least now he might receive (and accept) some professional help.

Date: 2011-10-28 03:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
Wilson definitely needs help, and so does House.
Thank you for the insightful comment.

Date: 2011-10-27 09:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] resm.livejournal.com
Do not leave us hanging here!!!! :O

Btw, just noticed your current music was "lack of twins," too cute lol. My cousin just had identical twins at the beginning of the summer so I can't wait to see the boys crawling about come Christmas lol.

Date: 2011-10-28 03:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I'm still revising the next chapter (plus, there are currently eight boys between nine and ten in my living room - I do miss the lack of twins music).

If your cousin's twins are as smart as mine they may not be crawling yet at Christmas. One of mine never moved in any way until he started walking in his fifteen month of life (he has not stopped running since, LOL).

Thanks for reading and commenting!

Date: 2011-10-27 10:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com
oh shit! Wilson!

Date: 2011-10-28 06:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
WIlson's in bad trouble, and House has missed it. I feel almost more sorry for him.

Date: 2011-10-28 07:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cuddyclothes.livejournal.com
This is very good, but I find it upsetting to read. The psychological atmosphere is dead on. "Suicidal Wilson" stories always leave me wishing I had not read them. This is a very good one, but I wanted to let you know why I am haven't commented on it (after that long discussion of to comment or not to comment). Perhaps it's too close to home.

Date: 2011-10-28 08:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damigella-314.livejournal.com
I'm so sorry. I should have reposted the warnings at every chapter :(.

I actually find writing about suicide therapeutical, especially suicide motivated by inability to do properly the work one is trained for followed by finding a way out through therapy. I want to believe in therapy. I need to.

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